My daughter woke me up a full 20 minutes before the alarm was supposed to go off. It may have looked to all the world like I was just staring blankly at the ceiling with my mouth hanging open, but oh no! My mind was in overdrive, like a crack squirrel on a hamster wheel, sharp as a wet paper trap. Oh yeah, I’m gonna mix all the
metaphors similies like Dennis Miller in a wet tee shirt contest reciting beat poetry to a flock of cocker spaniels. (That’s right. Edit, bitches!)
Just go with it, babe. The rule book is out the window. I did not get the memo.
Elvis has left the fucking building.
I have all kinds of ideas to throw at you. Careful! They’re hot.
- $$Fibromyalgia for Fun (Yours) and Profit (Mine)$$
- Pepé Le Pew is not just an Offensive Stereotype. He’s a Useful Creep.
- Speaking of Pepé, I felt guilty after I laughed, so that’s all right, then.
- Do Over! (Edit AGAIN! I rock my OWN world!)
- Gringa Binga — Even More Fun for You and Profit for Me–
— (I did it AGAIN! Somebody stop me!)
I think there were others, but I waited too long to write them down. Don’t worry. They’ll come back to me eventually.